Procrastinator
My voice sounds so sincere
As my words ricochet off the walls,
I built around myself
And my procrastinating instils in me, a great fear
To break down my walls would be an struggle,
A strain,
And I have nothing to prove
And yet, I have naught to show either
So in my empty world, I pull my nothing around me, to huddle
I sit and think, instead of move
But I speak out again, to hear my words
To let them sooth
Nikki
Poetry For The Broken
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Demonic Reasons
Just a little cautionary note: This poem contains
very strong language and may be TRIGGERY
for some. Keep yourself safe and please don't read it if you think
it'll badly affect you. Take Care, xxx R
Right now my mind state is wrong, I’m not sure
its ever been right
I realize I must remain strong, and hold my own while I’m
still in this fight
I keep my true feelings buried deep inside of me, and my nerves
hard as steel
My rage is so fucking intense there’s no way in hell you could
ever feel
My inner wounds are too brutal for them to even have a slight chance
to heal
Tell me, why am I cursed with this unavoidable anger, and where
should I deposit the blame
The sadistic beast that reigns inside of me, lately, hasn’t
felt quite the same
This must be his demonic method of amusement, but to me it’s
very far from a game
The creature is gradually taking me over, despite every defensive
strategy I try
Somewhere along my way I misplaced my emotions, now I can’t
even cry
I wonder if at an earlier point in life, my rage would somehow have
been detected
Would I have still spent all of these years blinded by ignorance,
and dangerously unprotected
Would this cruel hatred still be the foundation of the merciless
way that I feel
I must be hallucinating or dreaming because this fucked up life
simply can’t be real
75% of the time I’m enraged, the rest I spend in total disbelief
that this fucking place is so fake
I have ghastly nightmares when I sleep, because I dread being awake
I don’t know how much more of everybody’s shit I can
take
Lately its been freezing, the sun hasn’t even came out
I got sick of wondering what that crazy shit was about
Now I’m used to the darkness, but I don’t like it one
bit
They tell me that one day soon, the sun will come out from within
its pit
BUT I’M SO FUCKING SICK OF WAITING!!
TO HELL WITH THIS SHIT!!
I QUIT!!!
Curtis M. Grimes
11/27/02 |
