Look Out, Beware

What do i see? Crazy distortions, mental contorsions.
Ask "why me?" Why am the only one who can see?
See the evil, see it play. It lives in my head every day.
Watch my step lookout, beware.
Why must people whisper and stare?
But who am i? What is my purpose? I look like a clown out of a circus.
Jump through the hoops and do it well or i"ll end up in a prison cell.
I see madness, how it comes about. I could stand in the street and shout it
out. But that’s not right, that’s not good. God how it feels to be misunderstood.
You'd lock me up.
You’d be in my brain.
Then you’d drive me completely insane.
So laugh at me if you must. But I’d rather go back to bloody dust.
So i can't see, so i can't hear all the fun you make of me.
But really you’re just another statistic, certainly not i who has always
existed. Never been born, never to die. We’ll live in heaven the devil and i.
But now they capture me in mind, what is it they want to find?
Do i hold the answers?
Am i the key?
Stop it now you’re scaring me.
They stalk me in my sleep at night, they steal my breath away. To my head they
hold a gun to blow my brains away.
But you can lay me to rest.
You can put me to sleep,
you can dig my grave and dig it deep.
But deathless and timeless i shall go on. On and on until it's all gone.
Into oblivion, eternal peace.
And only then will this torture cease.

Ilona Burke