Link to homepage
Link to 'experiences' page
Link to 'views' page
Link to 'poetry and lyrics' page
Link to 'artwork' page
Link to 'links and information' page
link to 'action' page
Link to 'about me' page
arrow to previous entry
logo
arrow to next entry

Quick Fix

The other day a friend said to me:
"You know what your problem is - you are not self actualized."

It was an epiphany. People have only told me what I need to do, not what is actually wrong. All this time I have taken their advice on what I need to do.

Every morning I jump up, give myself a shake, and pack my bedclothes in the box so I can get moving (though I have had to cut back on the actual number of times I move) put on my girdle, to pull myself together and pull up my socks ( I attach them to garters so I do not have to keep doing this all day).

I look in the bright side of the bathroom mirror (I never can seem to get all the light bulbs working at the same time) and paint a smile on my face - all the while listening to a comedian on the radio to help keep my sense of humour.

These things give me the ":routine" that I apparently needed.

I walk down the street, of course constantly going slower and faster to change my pace, while holding my own hand tightly to keep a grip on myself while I get on with my life.

Now, finally, instead of what I need I am hearing what my problem is " You are not self actualized."

Desperate to hear more wisdom I say to my friend:"Well if I am not self actualized then am I not actually myself? - and if not myself - then who am I? and which one of us is depressed? (I always suspected that I had got the wrong Life)

So I eagerly ask him who this person is that I actually am, and why are they pretending to be me and how do I get myself back? Do I want myself back?"
He just shakes his head and walks away. I call to him - "Please do not leave me alone with this stranger, myself". He does not answer.

I think I know what his problem is - he does not actually listen. Does that mean he is not listening actualized? "

Sheila Paxton